Woke up this afternoon and began working on laying the tracks for a song I wrote called “She Hides When it Reigns”. Against my normal routine of playing guitar along with a metronome or ‘click track’ I just decided to try it straight with the tempo that I made for it, so that the song plays from me and not me playing on the schedule of the tick tock. Most of my recordings are done along a fixed time measure, but this time I am trying for something a little different.
“She Hides When it Reigns” has been a working idea I’ve had for a few months now. It’s about a person who spends their life ‘running from their feelings, instead of running towards them’. Instead of focusing on things inside that they seek, they are over saturated with their outer world. They spend their days awake being too involved in what is surrounding them, that it frightens them to much to take a leap in a direction of what they really want, and what they really need.
Living like that is so against my grain, it makes me sick on the inside. I could never walk in those shoes, I couldn’t lie awake in a bed and have one thought about the person next to me – that the person was not indeed that person that I was put on the planet to lay next to. But yet so many people sleep that way, for so long. I really can’t begin to understand, and never know how they sleep. But it’s only one part of the equation I suppose. It’s when you wake up and finally realize that it isn’t you and it’s not them, that’s when you know that it is too late and too far gone.
Instead of you feeling like you are the puzzle piece that fits into ‘life’, you have to really believe that ‘life’ is the puzzle piece that fits into you. You should make yourself the picture, and step away from painting yourself into the picture of another. Out of convenience or circumstance or whatever, It’s always your choice.
It’s when those feelings “reign”, when they overpower us, it’s like skywriting. How to hide from that I’ll never know. How you do it will always be a mystery to me.
And there is really no circumstance strong enough, there is no situation loud enough – that could ever dilute my desire to chase and fight for what I want. Why anybody would sand bag their own existence with that, is something I will never understand.
So here I sing.